Apocalypse Now
It is the 21st of December, 2011. (IST. Blogger follows US time and hence shows 20th) And followers of this blog would be well aware how idiotically superstitious I am about the end of the world that looms before us in the coming year. One. Precise. Year. But it is interesting to see how such a situation is possible and also to ponder upon the various stupid things that people would do when they know that the end is near. (On this note, I am remided of the pathetically sung "yamma yamma" 3.5 years ago by people who are currently in Stanford, the Goldman Sachs and a healthcare company.) The reason for such doom might be as scientific as the CERN LHC producing as much antimatter so as to cause large scale annihilation, something as pathetic as human ego and nuclear war, something as lame as the universe imploding upon itself, time moving backwards and the dead rising out of the graves causing a Zombie apocalypse or something as stupid as everyone simply forgetting to breathe. But among the hullabaloo let us fortget the cause and let us explore the consequences of such an apocalypse and try to predict what foolish things humans will do.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~The Mayan Stone Calendar of Doom! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Let us have a look at the facts and try to make a few logical (?) assumptions.
Fact 1: This belief was found in an ancient scripture buried under ground.
Fact 2: The dinosaurs reached extinction by an unknown cause.
Fact 3: Dinosaurs are buried under the ground.
Fact 4: Ancient civilisations are buried under the ground.
Assumption 1: Everybody firmly believes the rock of doom.
Assumption 2: We are the generation of the civilization of the rock predicting doom. (Or atleast our such interpretations of it).
Assumptions are meant to amuse rather than assume.
Now let us take a completely logical argument as to the possibilities that may occur and the implications:
This is not the first time that the end of the world has been predicted and neither will this be the last. Nonetheless, there is all possibility of climate extremes killing off loads of people or a massive earthquake/tsunami if the movies are to be believed. But one thing is common, people are bound to freak out if the Indian media lives upto to the pathetic standards that it has created for itself and creates a hype greater than the tall tales of Digvijay Singh. This would be as if you are told that you are suffering from a malignant tumour. Perhaps people will sell their houses and start spending all the money and improve India's presently poor economy. Perhaps many people will elope to be with the love of their lives. People might even commit suicides as was seen during the CERN firing up - believing hanging to be a much painless death that the thought of annihilation by antimatter. Or maybe in a final desparate attempt to save face,the UPA will table the JLPB. I predict a purely Harry Potter-esque scenario where everyone runs helter skelter and takes rash decisions.
But again, the world shall (hopefully) live on - perhaps even starting from scratch! But we shall linger... like we currently find the remains at Harappa and Mohen-jo-daro. Hopefully the whole of evolution will start all over again. In all probability, fire will never have been discovered! Humans might never develop opposable thumbs and life would be peaceful again. Our scriptures shall be found but the script would have been forgotten. But in the very rare case that the script is deciphered, imagine the kind of utopia where Harry Potter will be considered as ancient text! Voldemort shall assume the place of Ravan! (The 10 headed one and not the stupid Random Access One) But God forbid that twilight be found, then the future of this planet is really in danger. And amidst all this chaos, I really hope we could get back at those darned cockroaches who defy almost every law of evolution.
So in conclusion, we have one year to live. Try to make the most of it. As they say, Zindagi Na Milegi Dobara!
Yessssssssssssss I've kept up my goal of 14 posts per year \m/. Though I am not sure how much longer I'll be able to continue this blog.
Let us have a look at the facts and try to make a few logical (?) assumptions.
Fact 1: This belief was found in an ancient scripture buried under ground.
Fact 2: The dinosaurs reached extinction by an unknown cause.
Fact 3: Dinosaurs are buried under the ground.
Fact 4: Ancient civilisations are buried under the ground.
Assumption 1: Everybody firmly believes the rock of doom.
Assumption 2: We are the generation of the civilization of the rock predicting doom. (Or atleast our such interpretations of it).
Assumptions are meant to amuse rather than assume.
Now let us take a completely logical argument as to the possibilities that may occur and the implications:
This is not the first time that the end of the world has been predicted and neither will this be the last. Nonetheless, there is all possibility of climate extremes killing off loads of people or a massive earthquake/tsunami if the movies are to be believed. But one thing is common, people are bound to freak out if the Indian media lives upto to the pathetic standards that it has created for itself and creates a hype greater than the tall tales of Digvijay Singh. This would be as if you are told that you are suffering from a malignant tumour. Perhaps people will sell their houses and start spending all the money and improve India's presently poor economy. Perhaps many people will elope to be with the love of their lives. People might even commit suicides as was seen during the CERN firing up - believing hanging to be a much painless death that the thought of annihilation by antimatter. Or maybe in a final desparate attempt to save face,the UPA will table the JLPB. I predict a purely Harry Potter-esque scenario where everyone runs helter skelter and takes rash decisions.
But again, the world shall (hopefully) live on - perhaps even starting from scratch! But we shall linger... like we currently find the remains at Harappa and Mohen-jo-daro. Hopefully the whole of evolution will start all over again. In all probability, fire will never have been discovered! Humans might never develop opposable thumbs and life would be peaceful again. Our scriptures shall be found but the script would have been forgotten. But in the very rare case that the script is deciphered, imagine the kind of utopia where Harry Potter will be considered as ancient text! Voldemort shall assume the place of Ravan! (The 10 headed one and not the stupid Random Access One) But God forbid that twilight be found, then the future of this planet is really in danger. And amidst all this chaos, I really hope we could get back at those darned cockroaches who defy almost every law of evolution.
So in conclusion, we have one year to live. Try to make the most of it. As they say, Zindagi Na Milegi Dobara!
Yessssssssssssss I've kept up my goal of 14 posts per year \m/. Though I am not sure how much longer I'll be able to continue this blog.
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